Saturday, April 02, 2005

i'm sorry cant hook up with you peter

i dont think you'd be holding my hand if you meant that

i'm not holding hands with you you're holding hands hands with me

oh

i have a boyfriend

i know

doesnt this seem wrong then?

no. it feels more right than anything i've ever felt before

its the worst thing i could do to him though

i love you

kissing me doesnt have to be hooking up

and then i kissed her. no tongue. just a kiss.

and then she left.

and then i didnt know what to do with myself so i sat there and tried to read but i couldnt and hadnt eaten all day but wasnt hungry

fuck

Monday, March 14, 2005

and i wasnt ready at all today

but everything worked out
in the end anyway

drinking a vernors ginger ale
"barrel aged, bold taste!"
TM

talking to an older girl and she
recounts to me her sexual exploits
sexploits
her boyfriend is in
rehab

i have to pee
dont stop
flop
rock

i'm not even ready

and i have no time to prepare

Sunday, March 13, 2005

she says

quote
unquote

you give really
really
bad hugs

its sort of painful
to hug you
you're all tensed
up

whats the deal you
need hugging lessons
or something

you should do something
about those hugs of
yours they really
arent up to par with
most hugging standards

Thursday, March 10, 2005

i'm in the blogging
mood every now and then

most of all i like the people

and shakeer says* i can be a member of the yabosphere**

*SHAKEERonaim (10:31:09 PM): alright you're back in
SHAKEERonaim (10:31:12 PM): and you can be a yab then I guess

**term of my coinage

Update: I lied.

SHAKEERonaim (10:54:25 PM): we have to vote you in

Update update: SHAKEERonaim (11:10:37 PM): you're in

and sleep
i brought my brand new ipod photo to the schoolhouse today

some of the kids wondered how i got the ipod in color

and i said oh you just go to the apple site and download this special song and it turns your ipod into color

ha

i sure fooled them

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

some girls are blessed with breasts
or bressed with bleasts
or cursed

but allie bruce wasnt

and she says but your girlfriends clothes have no style

and i say at least my girlfriend can fill out her clothes

Thursday, February 17, 2005

I was listening to Jack Johnson and the Grey Album is right under it on my playlist and so I'm all Jack Johnsoning out when I hear Jay-Z and get confused.

Monday, February 14, 2005


we were never allowed to celebrate valentines day in elementary school because it was a jewish school

and valentines day wasnt jewish

we never had secret santa but on purim we picked names from a hat and had to make whoever we chose a purim basket

purim baskets have hamentaschen which are triangle shaped jam filled pastries

in fifth grade for the purim play i was haman
but purim plays arent purim plays theyre purim spiels

haman is the bad guy and every year up to the fifth grade i had been queen esters uncle mordechai

mordechai and haman were like opposites. mordechai was suave and wore a yamika. and was jewish. haman was creepy and wore a three cornered hat. he wanted to kill all the jews. bibical hitler.

in the end he gets hung by the same gallow he built to hang mordechai but that part wasnt in the fifth grade play.


fantastic.

i can't stand pierce brosnan as james bond

he's too much of a badass to be believable, but not enough of one for it to be okay anyway.

it may have something to do with him being british.

sean connery i can take because he has the heavy scottish accent. pierce's is whiny and annoying.

oh em gee xbox 2 is coming out this fall
but i cant get myself to play video games anymore
shucks